Wednesday 17 July 2013

Dear Sarah Carey

I read your article today in The Independent.  These are the three main issues I have with your piece.

You stated that Mary O'Rourke has said that the best way of dealing with sexist behaviour is to 'ignore it and keep doing (their) jobs.'  However if a woman has been groped, does that not show the lack of regard the groper has for the woman? The inappropriate behaviour in the Dail this week was shocking to me in another aspect.  Nobody saw fit to intervene or admonish the TD, as it happened.  How would a lady, in any circumstance, deal with this treatment if people around her act as if it is a non-event?

You say that you have been groped because you are small, however this makes your treatment even more reprehensible.  However thankfully you use 'amnesia' to forget the incidents.  Also you claim that you are not quick with retorts and call yourself 'slow.'  You really shouldn't be so hard on yourself.  I'm glad you have a sense of humour to help you through the difficult times.  Using that logic, I have no sense of humour because I don't like being mistreated.

Finally, you believe that you have psychological power over the person who has groped you, as and when he realises the error of his ways.  Surely that is an abuse of a different kind.  You see, I like men, some of my best friends are men, and I don't believe that kind of emotional blackmailing is good for you or him.  In my opinion, it increases the lack of trust between genders.  It takes away a little of your humanity and a little of his.

The addition of -gate to every piece of scandal trivalises a serious subject.